The Tree I Want To Be

     There is a sweet bay magnolia outside our office window at home.  This time of year it is filled with new baby birds being taught by their parents how to fly and what to eat .  At first the babies just sit in the tree and their parents bring seeds to them from the nearby feeders, but eventually the babies try to go to the feeder by themselves and that's when the fun begins! They fly to the feeder but aren't sure how to perch so they flap, and hover, and flap some more, ultimately returning to the tree with nothing to eat. It is great fun to watch!! But my point is, after every trial run they return to the tree. It is their shelter and support; their refuge.

     That's the kind of tree I want to be for the people in my life - a refuge.  So today I am thinking about the branches in my tree that I need to prune or nurture in order to be a loving shelter.

     Pruning first.....I am bossy and I think I know it all.  Let me just put that out there.  In self-defense, I think that comes from my years in the classroom when I was the boss and it was my job to know it all.  But now that I am retired it is time to prune that branch!  No one likes a know-it-all.  I also want to prune my branches of judgment and criticism.  I don't want to be limited or confined by judgments rooted in "my way" of doing things. We have so many wonderful young people in our family.  They see the world differently than the old guard does. I want to respect, not judge, their points of view.

                    "If you judge people you have no time to love them."  Mother Teresa

     Once these branches have been cut away, I want to nurture the branches of love and acceptance.  My grandmother called us her "precious darlings". If we misbehaved she would switch us with a bridal's wreath switch and still call us "precious darlings". It was awesome!!! Later when I was in my teens and being judged by peers about everything I did , said, or wore, being someone's "precious darling" was balm to my soul - a loving branch to perch on.  My great aunt, Hittie, also provided a tree of love and support.  Just walking into her house surrounded you with acceptance.  While you were there, she kept up a constant barrage of reinforcing comments such as, "I'm so proud of you!", "You are so smart!", or "That is wonderful!".  It was nurturing at its best and I was lucky to have it in my life!  That is why it is so very important for me to provide this tree, these branches, for the people in my life. 

        "Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit."  Peter Ustinov

                                                                                                              Love ya'll,  Shelli